From my porch in #PORCHLAND #pdxnow
Portland. Home of technicolor green everything, really, really low skies, and a post afternoon-pre dusk that starts at 2 and ends at 7pm.
This CANNOT be real, and if it is, I’m living in the wrong part of the country. This is not Schlomo’s beautiful porch. This is not his beautiful life. THIS is a Thomas Kincaid painting and I will NOT believe otherwise until I am flown out to the pacific North West and shown this wonder in person WITH a supper of sous-vide pastrami, thank you very much.
Nope. This is it. Portland. Schlomo can speak more at length about it.
Here’s the deal with the rain…
In the summer… a little fog and cloudcover in the AM maybe some rain, maybe not, it burns off by lunchtime and leads to sunny skies with big puffy cartoon clouds. Light jacket weather and jeans by night.
In the winter: clouds push in and are heavier and darker. More rain but the heavy rain is like a New Orleans or St. Louis moderate rain. But when ‘they’ say it rains 'all the time’ there is this kind of pissy near-drizzle that happens off and on many times a week intermittently throughout the winter.
It’s a rain that happens at a rate below the slowest intermittent wiper setting which means at random times during driving you have to hit the wiper thing just enough times and at just infrequent enough moments to be SUPER ANNOYING.
It is cloud in the winter and no big wide open sky. The sky looks like Jesus is slowly trying to smother the entire city with a big, grey, featureless pillow of shadow. Bring a raincoat. And a jacket. And jeans. When I was there, their version “of HOLY FUCK ITS COLD” was 42 and raining.
BUT, in spite of all this EVERYTHING IS SO FUCKING GREEN. Like insane, hallucinogen induced GREEN. Cartoon green. Unstoppable green. Green that looks like the green is actually becoming MORE green while you watch. Like the green is actively trying to be more green from the inside out.
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